vertical/personal
Me while sick: wow can’t wait to weigh myself after this
Me while shitting: wow can’t wait to weigh myself after this
Me while existing: wow can’t wait to weigh myself after this
Me while sick: wow can’t wait to weigh myself after this
Me while shitting: wow can’t wait to weigh myself after this
Me while existing: wow can’t wait to weigh myself after this
After I eat I actually miss feeling empty and hungry. It’s become comforting to starve myself.
Waking up on a chilly, autumn Saturday morning. It’s drizzling outside; rainfall is on its way. The room is freezing, but I’m finding warmth in a fuzzy oversized sweater.
My bed doesn’t make a sound as a crawl out. I go to weigh myself and the scale presents a beautiful number. I smile with pride as I make my way to the kitchen for a hot cup of coffee.
It’s starting to rain harder now- my blinds are open to let in the clouded morning light. I grab a book and a journal for a beautifully relaxing morning with a small, sweet breakfast to compliment my coffee.
After I work out I pamper myself a bit and take a long, hot shower. I grab a pair of xs leggings and my favorite sweater, looking tiny and adorable. Paired with boots & my mini backpack, I feel unstoppable.
After a bit of window shopping, I stop in a small cafe to grab some lunch. A small cup of soup or a kids meal; whichever I’m in the mood for. I choose green tea over soda and find a window seat to admire the chilly autumn day as I warm myself with my healthy comfort food.
It’s been a comforting feeling to know all eyes seem to wander onto me no matter where I go, but especially in restaurants. Everyone stuffs their faces with greasy, oil-encrusted piles of slop looking at me with my soup and tea and tiny frame. I can sense the jealousy and lack of self discipline in them and in some sick way, I thrive off of it. I finally feel like a tiny, delicate angel. Floating through life like I always hoped I could.
“I’ve been praying for years for something to kill me, so I don’t have to kill myself.”
-M.B.
me: guys weight loss is something that takes months so don’t stress if you don’t see results after a day!! have patience!!
me: *weighs myself literally every morning expecting to see a big change*
me: *doesnt see a dramatic drop in weight*
me: wtf kind of shittery is this i’m gonna fucking kms???
Me to others: “1200 calories is a very low amount!”
Me: *eats 10 calories*
Me to myself: “YOU. UGLY. ASS. FAT. BITCH! You’re going to become obese if you continue to live like this!”
me: why the fuck am i so depressed?
also me: *is starving myself*
*looking at my legs*: Oh my god why
*looking at my stomach*: Oh my god why
*looking at my arms*: Oh my god why
*looking at my face*: Oh my god why
*trying to exercise*: Oh my god why
*eating shitty food*: Oh my god why
*weighing myself*: Oh my god why
Other people: #bodypositivity! I love myself! Treat yo self!! Yolo.
Me: *tries to scrub fat off with a loofah*
